Not around my waist, although I have recently gone up a trouser size. So, in addition to this week's Soccerlens column, which is mainly on Burton Albion's title wobbles and includes references to Wilde and an impotence joke, there's exciting news on the assorted football stuff I do.
As from next Tuesday (hopefully), my good friend Chris Nee and I will be producing the Two Footed Tackle podcast. Which is essentially chat about football, but hopefully an entertaining chat about football.
It's not like this was planned. We'd both chatted about various podcasts we liked, he happened to mention he may have access to a radio studio, I mentioned my broadcasting background, and at that point we thought "why the hell not".
It'll be fun to get behind a broadcast desk again and even more fun to chat football for 40-odd minutes.
It's very much a communal effort and we'll be reviewing the big stories on the blogs as well as the papers, plus we're hoping to get some guests, bloggers and general football fans, in the studio to counterbalance our witterings. Should be fun.
At some point in time, I should also be contributing (hopefully) to the excellent Soccerlens podcast, which is a couple of episodes old and a very good listen indeed. It's also different to the one I'll be doing with Chris, so you don't get football fatigue.
It also means that all three of you who missed my dulcet tones after left the newsreading business will be able to get, um, aural pleasure from it again.